I sent a message to my friend Josie on Facebook and asked her if she received the Save the Date for our friend Ani's wedding. Please note that this Save the Date caused me much stress when it came in the mail about a month ago. I don't know if it was because I was PMS-ing or if I opened up the envelope when I was home alone on a Saturday night with a batch of Ghirardelli extra-fudge brownies baking in the oven. It was probably a combination of the two.
The Save the Date was absolutely gorgeous. So cute and original, and very Ani. I'll scan it later (maybe). What distressed me to no end was that the wedding is in Vero Beach, which is about three hours away from Miami and it's a whole weekend thing. Forgive me for not being a woman of the millennium, but I could not bring myself to spend a wedding weekend alone. And I love Ani dearly, but not even for her.
So I proceeded to sob. And sob. And sob some more. And then I texted my mom, who was having a great time at the Hard Rock on, of course, a triple date with her husband and some friends of theirs.
For your perusal, my ever-dependable BlackBerry still has the messages exchanged in its memory. Here it is:
Me:
I was looking thru the mail and I got the "save the date" for Ani's wedding. It is in April in Vero Beach. It is a "weekend wedding." Please explain to me how I am supposed to partake in this without a proper date? I am depressed.
Mom:
Don't worry. I told you that you will have your man. If not, we will hire someone just like Debra Messing did in that movie.
We exchanged a few more texts but I'll leave it at that.
As those of you who are single or have been single during a wedding, you feel my pain. If it would have been a typical wedding at a church and then a reception, I would've just gone through it. I would've been feeling very awkward, but I would've gone alone. But as I said, it's not here in Miami. I'm not going to drive three hours to then drive another three hours back home after the wedding. Another option would be to book a night at the resort, but I am NOT going to sleep in some beautiful resort on the beach alone. NO.
Back to the Facebook message and Josie.
Josie immediately sends me a text saying, and here is where I received the great news, that her boyfriend was going to be on a business trip in China that weekend and that she was probably going alone. Selfishly, I reply "That is perfect!" Of course, this was not the right thing to reply with because I'm sure Josie would've much preferred to go on a weekend beach getaway with her boyfriend. So Josie being Josie agrees to make a girls' weekend out of it and says we can be like Cameron Diaz and Christina Applegate in The Sweetest Thing (love that movie!). I told her we could only if she promised me that we'd wear brightly colored taffeta, just like they did in the movie.
So my trauma regarding Ani's wedding has been solved! Not by finding a great date, mind you, but by averting that situation altogether.
